It Hurts To Feel Left Out By Katherine Lightwood

It Hurts To Feel Left Out

By Katherine Lightwood

A few days ago some of my colleagues were laughing and goofing around with each other in our institute. And when I asked them what was that, they just gave me a cold shoulder saying these stuff is not for you, you are too 'geek' to handle all these. And that time I really felt left out. As if, I am not worthy enough to hear what others were laughing around. Although I have no interest in people's matter but sometimes I do crave for some interactions and thoughts of what people surrounding me are thinking about.

'Geek' is supposedly about trying to elevate those among us who are different from how we dress, what we wear, how we think, what we like. But being different the way I am and maybe the lot of you are can still be hard and can also be painful even if popular culture is telling us that is cool.

Now, why is that? Well!! same reason I used to get emotional when I see superhero movies. Because those movies focus on what it likes to be different and have no one understand you. Superhero characters do one of two things. They either try to fit in by hiding their powers or they band together to fight for their status. This struggle is very real for me and much as I sometimes find people who are like me and that makes me feel less alone (although this percentage is negligible).

But on the daily basis, for the most part, it feels really bad to feel like you are on the outside. A lot of times I feel left out because I just don't understand what's going on with new fashion trends, or who has affair with whom and what's not because I am different. What it looks like is people have conversations that I can't be a part of even though I am trying to. People at my surroundings speak about who had an affair, since when, why is she like this or why is he like this? When I sit with them people ask me what do I think about that? I have cultivated a "yeah, you are right" face and that also doesn't invite any further discussion. Because I have nothing else to offer.

And there's a feeling that I get when I am standing in a room of people who aren't into superhero movies or who aren't interested in the latest subatomic particles found in the Large Hadron Collider.  It's a feeling that hits like a jackhammer when I realize I have no idea what people are talking about. They are talking about people I don't know or aspects of life I can't relate to or they are laughing about something and I don't really think it's that funny.

This feeling is that exact same feeling that every nerd feels when they are at a social event with so-called 'normal' people and they have no idea what to say to anyone there. And that feeling doesn't really change from the time you are 12 to time you are 24. If you can't hang with whatever the majority conversation and culture looks like. So no matter how much geek is shown in popular culture and in media, it still feels really rough to be left out.

But at the end of the day, we must learn how to be comfortable with who we are. and with that comfort comes less anxiety about not fitting in and a broader understanding of our place in what can sometimes seems to be a universe of cool kids.   

So, that was my thought of the day. To see more posts like this make sure to visit our main page. And do not forget to visit our institute's page to know more about graphic design, 3D, animation courses and other awesome stuff. Till then good day to you.

Katherine Lightwood