Stop Self-Sabotaging...It's not Cool By Katherine Lightwood

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Stop Self-Sabotaging...It's not Cool

By Katherine Lightwood


We've all done it... we are so close to achieving our goal and there we are... getting in our own way.
There are many ways that self-sabotaging can manifest itself... some of the more obvious ones being procrastination, self-medicating or comfort eating.

And of course, there are more subtle ways that self-sabotaging can exist like having an aspiration that you never moved towards or having such a fear of abandonment that you cut ties once anything that too emotional or too serious or even just practicing alienating behaviors that push people away which is something I am struggling with. I do that a lot.

There are many reasons why we engage in self-destructive behavior, and for me, after my grandma died and some personal rift happened in my life, I felt like I didn't deserve to have a good life. So, subconsciously, I would make all these small choices that over time leads me to have a severely miserable life. 

I distance myself from people I was once friendly with, I have anxiety issues and I ran away from anything that made me happy. Now, those things don't make me happy at all. People surrounding me say that I've changed, I am rude and blah blah blah and last but not least I am crazy.

But once I realized that the underlying cause of self-sabotage behavior was feeling of unworthiness and guilt and I was actually able to understand myself much more and create a dialogue that I could have with myself each time I notice that I was being destructive.

So, I would have to ask myself 'Why am I doing this', 'Well!! I am doing this because it really makes me happy and that makes me scared because I don't think I deserve to be happy." and the conversation goes on and on inside my head until it hurts.

And I usually have this very logical Q and A with myself until it would emotionally resonate with me that it was coming from an illogical place of fear.

If you engage in self-sabotaging behavior I really urge you to figure out why you are doing it and when. Because the more you actually notice it, the easier it is to stop.

You will just need to challenge your negative thought process again and again and on some level, you will intellectually understand it. But trust me it will take a lot of time for it to actually sink in.

But before you know it and years and years of hard work and you will eventually stop. And I am believing this fact and holding on to my dear life like a koala bear. Because I really wanna live and not make the stupid mistakes I did on my past.     

So, that was my thought of the day. To see more posts like this make sure to visit our main page. And Do not forget to visit our institute's page to know more about graphic design, 3D, animation courses and other awesome stuff. Till then good day to you.

Katherine Lightwood        

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